beginnings...

beginnings are exciting, scary & traumatic... for dan and i, the beginning of this new journey started with the sale of our house on berkeley avenue in pasadena in late 2006. that sale was the first tangible sign from God that we were finally on the move...! we told only 3 individuals about our plan to sell and right away received positive responses. one couple needed to sell another home first before they could buy ours, but the other friend made us an offer that was very fair. plus, we knew that he would take care of the property and make the house even better because he had been wanting to return to pasadena for awhile now. so, our home was sold BEFORE the housing market went south. and what we thought would be a scary process turned out to be quite the opposite after all...

but, it was still sad to leave because 124 s berkeley had been our home base since my parents moved there in 1977. the kids grew up there and we had many wonderful memories associated with that house. but, it WAS time for us to move on and we couldn't move on without letting go of our biggest possession.

dan tells me that the next sign for him that this move to cebu was from the Lord was his deepening dissatisfaction with his job @ JPL. even though i wasn't experiencing the same dissatisfaction with my job @ kaiser -- i had the best manager and wonderful co-workers! -- the signal for me from the Lord that it was time to move on to something else was the fact that i was getting TOO comfortable and things were TOO good for me. a related sign from the Lord that this was the right time for us to move on to full-time Christian ministry was when dan stopped getting chest pains in the middle of the night. even though they turned out to be panic attacks/stress related, once he retired from JPL, the pains totally stopped!! how awesome a sign is that?!!!

the traumatic aspect of this new beginning for dan and me was, of course, leaving behind the kids and grandkids... we've now settled into a routine of emails, chats and phone calls and this keeps us connected which is important for all of us.

our move here to cebu is also a new beginning for my parents. now that we're here, they will be able to transition more of their daily/administrative duties to dan and me which would free them up to concentrate on teaching, preaching, writing, and mentoring. as a matter of fact, we received our "marching orders" yesterday, so we are officially on our way...!!

now that we're here, we really are beginning all over again... we've been unpacking and putting our things away, shopping for items that will help make our lives here run smoothly and more efficiently, organizing, getting used to a new routine, and, especially, getting used to it being "just the 2 of us...!" i think the scary and traumatic are behind us... this is now the exciting part -- waiting to see what the Lord has in store for us in this new phase of our lives!

what's amazing to me is that throughout this whole process, i can honestly say that i did not experience any anxiety. i just knew this was where the Lord wants me to be. i also knew that if He leads me somewhere, He will provide for ALL my needs -- emotional, physical, financial, and especially spiritual. i used to be a very emotional person -- always anxious about something!! but, the Lord has been teaching me these past 5-6 years that NOTHING that happens to us is unexpected to Him, so i should just trust Him!! it's been wonderful to just leave everything in His caring hands knowing that He has everything under control. and now that we're in full-time Christian ministry, "leaning on the everlasting arms" will HAVE to be our mindset. after all, "what have i to dread, what have i to fear," i'm leaning on the everlasting arms...!

yes, beginnings can be exciting, scary & traumatic. but with the Lord as part of that equation, beginnings are the door to a new adventure with surprises at every turn from the God who loves me, who has brought me here by His grace and His love. that same God is the One who will sustain me so i can do the job that He has in store for me.

my kids & letting go

from the moment ashley, justin & erin were born, i knew i had found my calling in life! i absolutely adored being a mother!

ashley was born when i was 25. it was such an easy birth and she was such a joy to take care of that i knew i would want more children after her. as the first grandchild born in my family, everyone doted on her, but she wasn't a spoiled kid, just loved by many because of her lovely smile, compassionate nature & ability to make friends easily!! I’ve always thought that, despite what I was personally going through at that time, God surprised our family by giving Ashley to us in September (my dad’s birth month), on the 29th (same day as my mom’s, only hers is in January)…!

during one of our annual wedding anniversary trips to baguio, dan and i were talking about what we would name our son, if God were to give us one. i remember telling him that i wanted to name him after his dad because i absolutely adored his father who was such a gentle and godly man, so we decided on justin daniel. our joy at having a son in 1983 knew no bounds and justin did not disappoint with his easy smile & laidback attitude. justin was like his paternal grandfather when he was a child, but has now become like my dad as he's grown older -- a man of vision and great plans for the Lord! that has been a wonderful surprise for me!

erin was an unexpected surprise in 1985. this was also an easy pregnancy, but little did we know that she was way off her due date (early april) because the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. we didn't know this until i was in the OR, ready to deliver, and my OB realized that she was in distress. consenting immediately to a c-section, it wasn't until the umbilical cord was cut right at my belly button that we realized how easily we could have lost her. being the youngest, erin had the privilege of an older sister and brother who took very good care of her. and being most like me in temperament, I found it easy to dote on this intelligent & winsome child that God had blessed us with.

when the kids were growing up, we did everything together. i wanted them to have the same love for travel that i had and because we had to travel back and forth to the states every year, that was easily accomplished and they did become great international travellers! ashley has been across the pacific more than 20 times!! justin started his over-the-pacific trips when he was only 7 months old and erin when she was 8 months!! we took many shorter trips once we settled in the states:   monterey, san francisco, san diego, and even that whirlwind 10 day cross country trip through 13 states in november 1994 that NONE of us will ever forget!! my wish is that someday, we'll all be able to travel to maybe greece & england together, places i visited when i was 19 and on tour with the MADS, and which i would love to enjoy and appreciate with my kids and grandkids. someday...

I wanted them to have my love of music, so they were involved in musicals early on. Ashley even performed at manila’s phil-am life auditorium when she was 9 as a member of FEBC’s “A, Basta!” production. And, surprise of all surprises!, I was even able to teach them to appreciate my love of COUNTRY music, esp songs by Randy Travis!!

but, with this trip to cebu, coming with us was no longer an option. both erin & justin are now married, each with a child of their own, & ashley is finishing up her RT course. plus, they have their own lives to lead now and dan and i have this new direction in which God has led us. even though i know all this, sunday night, 6/15, @ LAX was sad -- lots of tears and hugs and "see you in december!" i was leaving my babies behind... they will always be my babies, precious lives that were entrusted to my care by the God who trusted me to handle them with love that they deserved. and now, it was time for them to move on without us.

many hours later, i found myself crying on the plane, thinking about having to say goodbye and not being able to see them again until december. but, i also realized that we have done our part and it was time for them to move on without us constantly by their side. they're all adults now and more than capable of taking care of themselves and especially of making decisions that will glorify the Lord. i am looking forward to many surprises from God on their behalf!!

It was a few days later that i was pleasantly surprised to receive this email below from mark (caes), dan's cousin, who was also justin & gina's ninong at their wedding last july. he was responding to my request to call the kids every now and then to make sure they're doing OK. i will be forever grateful for his kind and caring words which greatly strengthened my heart. How blessed we are to have someone so caring like mark (and mabel) to stand in the gap for us!!

Don't worry, Ate Sharon! I will keep an eye, ear and nose on them. In fact, Justin and I have a dinner date with his family @ our house on June 30th when we get back after the choir retreat that week to feed off from each other re: his perspective on the ministry. Thanks for entrusting them to our care.

Please feel free to ask me anything re: your kids. I know how u feel. Much of my early adult life were spent living apart from my parents. I came here in the States when I was 19 years old and had to fend for myself to "survive". I am now 44 years old this day, exactly. I did cherish those "growing-up" years cause through it, I learned to trust God outside the comforts and direct supervision of my loving parents. The years spent apart from my parents brought indelible life lessons for me which brought me to maturity real quick. But never did I feel that I was abandoned by my parents because we communicated often with each other. Most of all, we kept each other close to heart in prayer.

Your kids are great, Ate Sharon! You and Kuya Dan are to be commended for the parental duties that you have faithfully performed. Your job is done. Your kids manifest your ideals and outlook in life and by just seeing and knowing them, you and Kuya Dan did an awesome job! Like me, I am sure your kids will recall the spiritual values that you have instilled in them in their formative years. So that when important decisions in life come, they will decide for themselves the best scenario that God has placed in their path. Each of them are ready to face challenges on their own. They are more than ready to stretch their "wings" and "soar" to greater heights. But, it would also take great pains for you to let go of them and entrust them completely in the loving care of our Heavenly Father.

You and Kuya Dan face a complete paradigm shift in your new vocation - a new "calling," albeit an exciting one where God has brought you. God Bless you both as you serve Him faithfully!

"Dan In Real Life"

early monday, june 16, @ 145, dan and i left for cebu, philippines, starting the next phase in our lives -- retirement. but, this isn't retirement in the sense that we'll be sitting on the beach reading the latest david baldacci, james patterson or steve martini novels while slowly sipping a grande strawberry margarita. instead, we'll be helping with EL International Church and its various ministries -- churches, seminary, kindergarten -- in order to free my parents from the daily administrative duties so they can concentrate on preaching, teaching & writing before the Lord decides it's time for Him to bring them home to Himself.

leaving CA meant leaving behind our kids, ashley, justin & erin, and our grandkids, josiah (3+) & keilah (7 weeks). that was probably the hardest thing i've ever done because, for the past 28 years, we have never left our kids like we're leaving them now. this time around, we'll be gone for 6 months, returning in december to visit for only a month. so, our home base has shifted from CA to cebu, but our family did not shift with us.

10 hours into the flight, thinking about this great change in our lives and feeling sad about leaving the kids, i decided to watch "dan in real life." i'd seen the previews for this movie, but had no idea what it was about. i found myself getting caught up in the story of dan, a widower, the stormy relationship he was having with his 3 daughters, his falling in love with his brother's girlfriend... at the end of the movie, dan was saying that we can do all we can to help our kids plan for various aspects of their lives, but maybe what we need to do is also teach them to plan to be surprised. I thought that described my current situation to a T, but I knew there was an element missing in that line that needs to be there for me: God. it is He who will bring surprises along the way as we live to become more Christlike. it is God who showed dan and me, once we decided to retire early from our jobs, that cebu is where He wants us to be.

so, that's how "plan to be surprised by God" became the title of my blog. i plan to be surprised by God during this next phase of my life. i look forward to the surprises that my kids will encounter as they learn to live their lives without us being a 10-minute drive away from them... i plan to be surprised by how God will provide for our needs, now that we're living off of our savings & dan's small pension from JPL...

exciting times are still ahead of us and i'm eagerly waiting to be surprised by God at every turn!!