BACKGROUND/COMMENTARY (David Guzik at blueletterbible.org): This chapter deals with the very sad and unfortunate chain of events that began with Ammon's obsession with his half-sister Tamar and ended with Ammon's murder at the hands of Absalom's men. Absalom and Tamar were the children of David through David's wife named Maacah, who was the daughter of Talmai, king of Geshur (2 Samuel 3:3). Amnon was David's first born son, born from his wife Ahinoam the Jezreelitess (2 Samuel 3:2). Being the first born, Amnon was the crown prince - first in line for the throne of Israel.
Amnon longed for Tamar so much that he became lovesick. It was even more difficult for him because she was a virgin - meaning that she was available for marriage, but not to Amnon because marriage between half-brother and sister was forbidden. As later events will show, Ammon did not love Tamar at all. Amnon lusted after Tamar and called it love. He certainly is not the last person to do this, and lust often presents itself as love. In verses 11 to 14, we are told of Ammon's rape of Tamar. This was followed in verse 15, of Ammon's rejection of Tamar. "Amnon hated her exceedingly: This reveals Amnon's attraction for Tamar for what it was - lust, not love. Amnon was attracted to Tamar for what he could get from her, not out of concern for her. In many lustful relationships there is a combination of both love and lust but in Amnon's attraction there was only lust."
Absalom's words to his men to "fear not" just shows that Absalom felt he was justified in committing murder because of Ammon's ungodly treatment of his sister Tamar. He was telling his men that their act of murder was necessary so they were to be courageous and valiant in their attack on Ammon. The use of "fear not" in this verse is the opposite of God telling His children to "fear not" because when God says this, He means that He is with us and will protect us and make us victorious because our mission is just and pure. Absalom's men's mission, however, would never be sanctioned by God, yet Absalom decided to go ahead and "play God" where his sister's honor and reputation was concerned.
From Robert Jamieson @ blueletterbible.org: The law as to premeditated murder ( Num 35:21 ) gave Absalom no hope of remaining with impunity in his own country. The cities of refuge could afford him no sanctuary, and he was compelled to leave the kingdom, taking refuge at the court of Geshur, with his maternal grandfather, who would, doubtless, approve of his conduct." "In Eastern countries, where polygamy prevails, the girls are considered to be under the special care and protection of their uterine brother, who is the guardian of their interests and their honor..." However, by committing pre-meditated murder, instead of being able to protect his sister, Absalom had to leave his home and flee to Talmai. This left Tamar alone, depressed, and possibly suicidal because of what had been done to her.
PERSONAL APPLICATION (David Guzik): In this single-minded lust, Amnon only built upon the example of his father David. David was never this dominated by lust, but he was pointed in the same direction. David's multiple wives (2 Samuel 3:2-5) and adultery with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11:2-4) displayed this same direction. This is often how the iniquity of the fathers is carried on by the children to the third and fourth generations (Exodus 20:5). A child will often model a parent's sinful behavior, and go further in the direction of sin the parent is pointed towards."
As for committing pre-meditated murder, that's a no-brainer… After all, God gave us a specific command NOT to murder. He intended for us to follow that to the letter of the law.
i wonder what happened to Tamar... we don't hear about her after this... i hope she wasn't left to cope all alone with the broken pieces of her life...
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