the whole package

for the past few weeks, during my down times or when i just need to "chill," i have been indulging in my current guilty pleasure -- watching the beginning episodes of "gilmore girls." i just finished seasons 1 to 4 and will now have to wait until i get back to the states to buy seasons 5 to the finale...! maybe someone will buy me the rest of the series as a Christmas gift... :-)

anyway, at the end of season 2, lorelai gilmore, played by lauren graham, the single mother in the series, makes the statement about wanting "the whole package" -- a husband, a family, the white picket fence... and that made me think... if ashley and i had gone through life together--just the 2 of us like lorelai & rory gilmore--would i have eventually asked that same question of myself? maybe...? eventually...? what i do know is that once ashley was born and i saw this beautiful child whose entire existence depended on me, i knew that i could go through life taking care of ashley on my own, if that's what God had planned for me.

but, God DID have other plans for me and for ashley. without me doing anything about it, God was working in dan's heart as to what was the right thing for him to do in our situation. and during one of his yearly trips to the Philippines, when ashley was 6 months old, God allowed my dad the opportunity to bring ashley's album with him to show to dan and dan's parents. this man who had not wanted me to keep the baby could no longer deny that ashley was his child once he saw her pictures. after that, it was simply a matter of time before i found myself agreeing to marry dan. in hindsight, i really should have asked more questions of dan and his commitment to me and ashley. i should have waited a little longer before setting a wedding date. but, God knew what He was doing and through the years, i have learned to trust Him during those life-changing decisions.

so, in the end, God DID give me "the whole package." it hasn't been an easy road and there have been many bumps along the way (although those bumps are what we climb on), but i'm thankful for the life that God has given me. i'm thankful for the hard and sad times and the wonderful & great times. i really wouldn't trade what i've gone through because all of those experiences have made me the person that i am today. God has been very good to me and i will do everything i can to be worthy of His goodness to me and to my family.

speaking from my heart...

A Catholic Case Against Barack by Patrick J. Buchanan
Posted 08/12/2008 ET

In the Pennsylvania primary, Barack Obama rolled up more than 90 percent of the African-American vote. Among Catholics, he lost by 40 points. The cool liberal Harvard Law grad was not a good fit for the socially conservative ethnics of Altoona, Aliquippa and Johnstown. But if Barack had a problem with Catholics then, he has a far higher hurdle to surmount in the fall, with those millions of Catholics who still take their faith and moral code seriously.

For not only is Barack the most pro-abortion member of the Senate,with his straight A+ report card from the National Abortion Rights Action League and Planned Parenthood. He supports the late-term procedure known as partial-birth abortion where the baby's skull is stabbed with scissors in the birth canal and the brains are sucked out to end its life swiftly and ease passage of the corpse into the pan. Partial-birth abortion, said the late Sen. Pat Moynihan, "comes as close to infanticide as anything I have seen in our judiciary."

Yet, when Congress was voting to ban this terrible form of death for a mature fetus, Michelle Obama was signing fundraising letters pledging that, if elected, Barack would be "tireless" in keeping legal this "legitimate medical procedure."

And Barack did not let the militants down. When the Supreme Court upheld the congressional ban on this barbaric procedure, Barack denounced the court for denying "equal rights for women."

As David Freddoso reports in his new best-seller, "The Case Against Barack Obama," the Illinois senator goes further than any U.S. senator has dared go in defending what John Paul II called the "culture of death." Thrice in the Illinois legislature, Obama helped block a bill that was designed solely to protect the life of infants already born, and outside the womb, who had miraculously survived the attempt to kill them during an abortion. Thrice, Obama voted to let doctors and nurses allow these tiny human beings die of neglect and be tossed out with the medical waste.

How can a man who purports to be a Christian justify this?

If, as its advocates contend, abortion has to remain legal to protect the life and health, mental and physical, of the mother, how is amother's life or health in the least threatened by a baby no longer inside her -- but lying on a table or in a pan fighting for life and breath?

How is it essential for the life or health of a woman that her baby, who somehow survived the horrible ordeal of abortion, be left to die or put to death? Yet, that is what Obama voted for, thrice, in the Illinois Senate.

When a bill almost identical to the one Barack fought in Illinois, the Born Alive Infants Protection Act, came to the floor of the U.S. Senate in 2001, the vote was 98 to 0 in favor. Barbara Boxer, the most pro-abortion member of the Senate before Barack came, spoke out on its behalf: "Of course, we believe everyone should deserve the protection of this bill. ... Who could be more vulnerable than a newborn baby? So, of course, we agree with that. ... We join with an 'aye' vote on this. I hope it will, in fact, be unanimous."

Obama says he opposed the Born Alive Infants Protection Act because he feared it might imperil Roe v. Wade. But if Roe v. Wade did allow infanticide or murder, which is what letting a tiny baby die of neglect or killing it outright amounts to, why would he not want that court decision reviewed and amended to outlaw infanticide?

Is the right to an abortion so sacrosanct to Obama that killing by neglect or snuffing out of the life of tiny babies outside the womb must be protected if necessary to preserve that right?Obama is an abortion absolutist. "I could find no instance in his entire career," writes Freddoso, "in which he voted for any regulation or restriction on the practice of abortion."

In 2007, Barack pledged that, in his first act as president, he will sign the Freedom of Choice Act, which would cancel every federal, state or local regulation or restriction on abortion. The National Organization for Women says it would abolish all restrictions on government funding of abortion.

What we once called God's Country would become the nation on earth most zealously committed to an unrestricted right of abortion from conception to birth.

Before any devout Catholic, Evangelical Christian or Orthodox Jew votes for Obama, he or she might spend 15 minutes in Chapter 10 of Freddoso's "Case Against Barack." For if, as Catholics believe, abortion is the killing of an unborn child, and participation in an abortion entails automatic excommunication, how can a good Catholic support a candidate who will appoint justices to make Roe v. Wade eternal and eliminate all restrictions on a practice Catholics legislators have fought for three decades to curtail?

And which Catholic priests and prelates will it be who give invocations at Obama rallies, even as Mother Church fights to save the lives of unborn children whom Obama believes have no right to life and no rights at all?

Source: http://www.humanevents.com/article.php?print=yes&id=27992

28 years ago i faced what was the biggest dilemma of my life at that time. i was pregnant and unmarried. i had good friends who advised me to have an abortion. their reasons seemed fine on the surface, especially their argument that after the abortion, i could go on with my life and not be saddled with a child which might further hamper my attempts to find a man who would want to marry me AND my child. one phone call, in particular, was especially hurtful. it was from the baby's father's on again-off again girlfriend at the time who called me from the philippines to tell me that i would be jeopardizing the father's future (and maybe hers?) if i decided to go on with the pregnancy. little did she know that that phone call would be the impetus for me to WANT to keep the baby...!

i had other friends who told me to go on with the pregnancy and keep the baby or put the baby up for adoption. because i was not sure what road to take, i decided to read up on everything regarding abortion. i remember bringing home piles of books from BIOLA's library (i was working at BIOLA's Dean of Student Services Office at the time) in order to educate myself. what i read convinced me that abortion was NOT for me and reinforced my belief that each life is a PRECIOUS gift from God. many years later, i remain convinced of this and even more so, as i believe that God gives life and only God can take it away. taking someone else's life, especially that of an innocent unborn child, is not our right!!

so, when i read something like pat buchanan's piece above, i am angered that people like obama still believe that they have the right to take someone else's life away. and to think that he will do that when he's president... i shudder at the thought that someone who brags about being a "Christian" can have that mindset and brag that he will push through his "agenda of death" when he's president...

of course, i believe that if God wants to, he can put HIS choice in the presidency. but, God also allows us free will and if the people of the united states are stubborn enough to insist on electing someone who believes in death to innocent individuals, God can also allow that. but, if that happens, i feel that that is the beginning of the end for America. every nation that has allowed and tolerated death to the innocent has disappeared from this earth. look at what happened to the Roman Empire with their sadistic delight at watching Christians fight against hungry lions in the Coliseum. look at the once-mighty German nation that slaughtered millions of innocent Jews during the Holocaust.

it is my prayer that all Christians in the US really think and pray about who to vote for in november. as for me, i am taking my stand and declaring that, as a Christian, i cannot in good conscience vote for obama.

May God's will be done in the upcoming elections.

eternity...

"However mild his manners, Jesus was intent on warning us about our spiritual destiny beyond this life. And surely his intense concern was not misplaced. How often do we really stop and think about life after death and about the possibility of hell and punishment? Those aren't subjects we want to dwell on while we eat our breakfast and read our morning paper. But if we listen carefully to Jesus, he is saying that many people are standing in spiritual jeopardy at this very moment. "Many are trying to enter through the narrow door of heaven," says Jesus, "but not all will succeed."

Let's be honest -- don't we sometimes have real difficult believing that there is a place of eternal destruction called hell? Isn't that why we make jokes about it? Isn't that why we hear the word tossed around like any other expletive and reduced to some bad experience we might have in this life? But the same Jesus who tells us there is a heaven also tells us in no uncertain terms that there is a hell. Can we accept one and ignore the other? Hell is God's love expressed as a warning.

As Christians, we take confidence in God's saving grace, as well we should. We have eternal life as a promise of God! But Jesus warns that we should not take his mercy for granted and turn our backs on his forgiveness. There are going to be more than a few surprises in heaven and hell. In view of our eternal destiny, there are more than a few questions we need to ask.

Who are we really serving in our lives: God or money? Have we really given up our lives for Christ, or are we just toying around with the idea of self-sacrifice? Have we really humbled our hearts before God to do his will, or is our humility just a photo opportunity for those around us? Is the kingdom of God really within us, or have be substituted a bustle of "church activities" in its place? Are we really taking up Jesus' cross, or are we just wearing it around our necks for decoration? We need to take a hard, honest look at ourselves as we come ever closer to eternity!

But if our answers are not always the most encouraging, there is yet hope. Jesus' warnings are invariably accompanied by precious promises. You can almost imagine the picture he paints, of angels in heaven looking down in anticipation of the unnamed, unknown, insignificant sinner who is about to repent. Will ours be the name which initiates their celebration today?" ("30 Days With Jesus" devotional)

i read this during one of my morning devotions and it was brought home more forcefully to me on thursday night, 8/7, when my dad preached at the wake of his half-sister's husband. pedring tanajura finally succumbed to lung cancer that had lingered for years. i never knew him, but from what i've been told, he was not a very nice man. not only was he a drunk and abusive to my auntie neneng and her children, but he was an adulterer who left my auntie for their maid and had a second family with this other woman. even when he knew he was dying and there was no more hope for his recovery, he continued to be abusive to my aunt despite the fact that his REAL family took him back when the doctors had given him no more hope and allowed him (and the other woman!) to live in a room in my auntie's house. on friday, 8/1, the day before he died, i was told that he asked for forgiveness from everyone he had wronged and abused. that night, my auntie read from the Psalms to him to help him get some sleep and he died peacefully during the reading.

at the service, my dad preached on Job 14:14 where Job asks, "If a man die, shall he live [again]?" the answer is YES! but, our destination will be either Heaven or Hell. the choice rests with us. my dad believes that my auntie's husband was sincere in his decision for God 3 years ago when his son died and that's probably why he was allowed to die peacefully because his heart was right with God.

as followers of Jesus Christ, we have our work cut out for us to share with those we care about that God doesn't want us to spend eternity in hell. He wants everyone to come to Him and spend eternity with Him -- that's why He came to earth to die for us sinners.

my dad did not mince words that night. he presented the Gospel to the 30+ people who were in attendance and he asked them to make a decision for Christ. 18 individuals signed the decision sheet at the back of my dad's "Cebuano Gospel of John." i know the angels in heaven were singing HALLELUJAH!!! for each person that made a genuine decision for God that night.

it also made me realize that I must do MY part to bring others to the Lord. the time will come when the opportunity to make that decision for Christ will have passed. so, while there's still time, i need to do everything i can to make sure that those i love and care about will be in heaven with Jesus and with me when we leave this earth. please pray that i will be bold, courageous and vigilant in doing this task for the Lord!

testimony

this is what i shared with the student body of EL Theological Seminary during yesterday's (Saturday, 8/2/08) chapel:

Webster’s Dictionary defines “testimony” as: “firsthand authentication of a fact: an outward sign or evidence; an open acknowledgment and/or a public profession of religious experience.” And when we as Christians are asked to give our personal testimony, we are publicly acknowledging our experience as a child of God. Just as we are all personally different and unique, in the same way, our personal testimony of coming to know the Lord and our ongoing spiritual journey is also unique.

For me, I was 6 years old when I accepted Christ as my personal Savior during our nightly family devotions with my mother. We were reading John Bunyan’s “Pilgrim’s Progress.” I remember being scared about going to hell and that helped clinch the decision for me.

Actually, it was an easy decision for me to make. Looking back, I think the advantages of being saved at an early age include the fact:
1) That the process from going from unsaved to saved appears seamless. I really did feel like I had been a Christian all my life.
2) I didn’t have to struggle with the decision as it just made sense to me to become “saved.” And also because it seemed to be expected of me.

On the other hand, the disadvantages of being saved at such an early age seemed to me to be:
1) Taking for granted the fact that this decision IS life-changing and should not be taken lightly
2) Seems more exciting and life-changing to become a Christian after being an unbeliever for so long, especially after sowing one’s “wild oats”

On top of becoming a Christian at a young age, I was also a PK, pastor’s kid. Being a PK meant having to be at church every Sunday and even for prayer meetings on Wednesday nights. When our family went to the States in 1965 in order for my parents to pursue their graduate studies at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, we traveled every Sunday to different churches in Illinois and Wisconsin and in the summer, we would venture out even further into Iowa, South Dakota, Michigan. This was how my father provided for the family – by preaching in different churches. Our whole family would sing one or two songs and my brother, sister and I would play our instruments before my father preached. All of this meant that we had to be on our best behavior and had to act and be “spiritual” because we were, after all, PKs, even if we didn’t feel like it at times. But, I am grateful for the discipline during those years, because it helped to keep me on the straight and narrow in later years. One result of this discipline early on in my life is that I have always made it a priority to be in church on Sunday. And this is one practice or habit that I’m thankful my children have also incorporated into their lives.

When I was 15, my dad was asked to be the missionary speaker at Camp Willabay in Wisconsin. It was during that summer that I joined the other campers in rededicating my life to the Lord, promising Him that I would go into full-time Christian service someday. Of course, I didn’t know what that decision would entail and it wouldn’t be until many years later that I would hear the call to serve the Lord full-time.

My high school years were spent at Faith Academy, a Christian school in Manila. During my sophomore, junior and senior years, I was a member of the MadriGals and Guys, an exclusive singing group at Faith. During those 3 years, as we traveled all over the Philippines giving concerts, we also had to be ready to give our personal testimony as we never knew when our director, Dick Cadd, would tell us it was our turn to share. Those years proved to be a great time of learning for me with respect to sharing my spiritual journey with people we would meet during our concerts. Those years really stretched and strengthened my faith. I would say that I grew a lot spiritually because of the MadriGals and Guys.

In early May 1974, I graduated from Faith Academy and from April to June of that year, because the majority of us had just graduated and were headed to the States for college, the MadriGals and Guys went on an overseas tour. We traveled to Athens, then on to Germany, Amsterdam, and London, before landing in New York for the US leg of our tour. We traveled from Rhode Island to Illinois, singing almost every night and sometimes during the day at high schools and colleges along the way. If ever I could say there was a high point in my Christian experience, it would be those 3 months when my faith was tested, but I found encouragement and enjoyment in serving the Lord through music and sharing my faith with others. I experienced the greatest growth in my Christian life during this time because all of my focus was upon the ministry we were doing and being a good testimony for the Lord wherever we happened to be. It was a truly wonderful and life-changing experience!

Unfortunately, that “spiritual” high was followed by many lows when I had to stay behind in Chicago at the end of the tour so I could earn some money before starting college @ Trinity that fall. First, it was hard to be SO far away from my family. Second, working in a home for mentally challenged kids really tested my faith because I had never in my life been around kids who had so many problems and whose families had decided they could no longer care for them, so they gave that responsibility over to this home for the mentally handicapped. It was a truly eye-opening experience for me.

I thought things would be better once I was in school with fellow Christians, but my freshman year proved to be another low point for me spiritually. Of course, the low point was a result of a broken heart! I was just one of many girls in college who felt this way after a relationship fell through, but at the time, I thought I was the only one going through such pain. I remember writing my parents a long letter about my heartache and telling them that I didn’t think God could be a God of love if He allows us to suffer so much! Needless to say, I was very angry with God for most of my freshman year.

But, God has a way of drawing us back to Himself. He allows those difficult times to come into our lives so that we will grow and mature and He brings people into our lives to encourage us to “keep the faith” and to trust in God’s divine plan for our lives. My parents were especially instrumental in my coming back to the Lord because instead of condemning me for “hating” God during my freshman year, they just kept praying for me and their prayers and love and support during that very difficult year showed me that God really did care about me and that He DOES has a wonderful plan for my life.

It’s sad, but it’s also a fact that being in a Christian college doesn’t always strengthen your faith. It’s very common for many college students to stray from their faith because of the excitement of being away from home and being independent for the first time. But, because of my parents’ prayers and the Christian heritage that I grew up in and was blessed with, despite the backsliding, the many crises of faith that I experienced and the times of unfaithfulness, God, on the other hand just continued to prove Himself faithful to me over and over again. I know that He protected me from myself and the unwise choices that I made, from people who might have wanted to harm me or influence me for evil and He did all that because He has something great in store for me. And, I firmly believe this, He continued to love me and protect me because I had made that promise to go into full-time Christian service some day.

My spiritual journey has not been a smooth one. I don’t know of anyone whose journey to become a true child of God has not been marked with backsliding, hardships, testings, doubt, and fear. But I DO know this – God IS faithful. God DOES know what He is doing in our lives and He will accomplish what He has divinely ordained for us, despite our backsliding, our unfaithfulness, our stubbornness. He continues to remain faithful to us.

My Christian life has not been a straight, upward moving line. It’s been full of ups and downs, moments of doubt, wanting to give up & failures. Our family went through our deepest valley nine years ago. It was something that crushed and almost destroyed us. But, as I limped along, trying to recover my sanity and my self-worth, I literally felt like God was propping me up during those heart-breaking years through the prayers that were being uttered for us and through my wonderful female friends who walked through that deep, dark valley with me – praying me through and encouraging me in my faith every step of the way. I really can’t thank God enough for friends like that!! During those dark days, I clung to Psalm 91, verses 1, 2, & 11: “He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust…For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.”

Needless to say, that painful experience was another turning point in my life. It was God’s way of breaking me and making me more dependent on Him. It’s a lesson that I continue to fall back on even now. Through those dark days, God showed Himself to be truly compassionate, ever loving, the healer of broken hearts. And as a result of that, I felt that He had made me more compassionate and understanding of the aches and heartaches that people, especially women, are experiencing. It was a few years later when I felt like I was on my way to healing emotionally that God reminded me of the promise I had made when I was 15 to go into full-time Christian ministry and that’s when the desire to return “home” started to take root and grow. Sometime that I just realized today is that God prepared me for moving back here by allowing me to return 7 times in the past 5 years!! Each visit made it seem more and more like I was “coming home…”

So, now, here we are in Cebu. I won’t enumerate the steps or process of how we got here since Dan already shared that with you last Saturday. We’ve come by faith, having taken early retirement from our jobs. Our kids, especially our youngest daughter Erin, worry about our finances because we are now living off of our savings. But, we’re trusting God to provide for ALL our needs because we have seen firsthand His faithfulness over and over again in my parents’ lives and in this ministry that God has given to them. This same God that my parents have put their full faith and trust in ALL these years is the same God who KNOWS and holds my future. He has been faithful to me in the past. He’s brought me this far and I KNOW He will be faithful in the years to come.

In closing, let me share with you one of my favorite verses that never fails to bring a smile to my heart as I anticipate the future that awaits me in heaven with our wonderful Lord and Savior who loves me and has only my best interest at heart--Psalm 16:11: “Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence [is] fulness of joy; at thy right hand [there are] pleasures for evermore.”